Cartier Introduces Gold And Diamond Bernard Madoff Voodoo Doll

Luxury jeweler Cartier has announced plans to introduce a $1500 Limited Edition Bernard Madoff voodoo doll, featuring a lock of the alleged ponzi schemer's hair. "Working with artisanal native craftworkers from Haiti, Cartier will produce an authentic Madoff Voodoo Doll," according to a Cartier press release. "With the exclusive-to-Cartier feature of an actual lock of Mr. Madoff's hair, owners may use the five 24 carat gold pins with diamond accents to stab the doll whenever and wherever they please, as often as they wish, and the pain of the puncture will be transmitted via the black spell of the netherworld directly to Mr. Madoff himself."

Cartier says its initial foray into luxury accessories for witchcraft is in response to overwhelming consumer demand. "Our customers -- many of whom suffered grievous financial injury from Mr. Madoff's actions -- indicated their desire to combine a wish for retribution with beautiful, yet functional, jewelry," a spokeman for Cartier said. Cartier would not disclose how it had obtained locks of Madoff's hair, but noted that each voodoo doll will be accompanied by a certificate of authenticity.